Having an affair

Having an Affair

Sad to say, but I have decided to have an affair. There’s no food at home, and I’m hungry as hell. Not to mention furious that I am forced to forage for my own meal. Fine! Let’s see what’s out there…

Some of the women I associate with have confided their sex escapades with me. I am looking to these women for mentorship, being a new member of the club and all. These groups have a culture all on their own.

My associate Gloria had pointed out to me how sexy and good looking my pool man is. How about him? she asked. He is young, hot and convenient. Taking a moment to really look at Arturo, I decided he wasn’t for me. He may be young and muscular, but there’s this whole body odor thing with the sweat and being out in the sun all day. And I just don’t do hired help. Please! That’s just not classy.

Sissy from Malibu suggested going online. Hmm that’s not a bad idea. I can narrow it down to exactly the type of man I would like, looks and everything. Just like ordering from a catalog. And best of all, since they’re also attached, there will be minimum demands, maximum discretion. I agreed and made a date with Sissy and Gloria to have ladies night at my house, set up an online profile, armed with mojitos and martinis.

The Photo Problem:
I realized that I didn’t have a single photo of me by myself. Well, any recent photo that is. I was opposed to this idea, but apparently it’s a must if I expect to have any kind of decent response. After several drinks, we agreed that provocative photos are in order. Gloria will take the photos and Sissy will edit them. Just one or two photos will do. Going through my wardrobe, I settled on a sexy black dress. I applied liberal make-up, and fixed my hair up. Wow, I felt like I was auditioning for a brothel. A pose here, a pose there, and voila! With liquid courage flowing through my veins, I even managed to show a little underwear.

Describe Yourself:
Should I lie? Definitely! But not about my physical attributes. After all, I will be meeting them in person. So I lied about my hobbies. Men like a woman who is adventurous. So we wrote that I like to hike, go camping, kayaking, skiing and more. We tried to cover all seasons. Filled with sexual innuendos and appealing adjectives, we posted the profile.

Let’s see what type of response we’ll get …